Mr. Clean

I'd like to introduce you to Joey Green....

 also known as "Mr. Clean"

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Do you see the likeness?

Well, OK, so Joey seems to be a bit slimmer...

and he's put some clothes on...

and he is wearing something on his head...

No, he is not wearing a colonial mob cap.

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It is a .... 

Never mind, I'll tell you about it later, after I tell you some of the tips 

I learned from Mr. Clean Joey Green! 

Joey Green has collected or discovered, and written about,

hundreds of uses for hundreds of things, 

other than what they were originally designed to do.

We went to a presentation at an RV Show in Charlotte.

I was fascinated. 

Here are a few of the suggestions Joey shared with us: 

• Use Coke to clean oil off your driveway. Pour it on, let it sit overnight and then hose it off.
• Tang drink powder can be used in place of dishwasher soap to clean built up soap scum
• Bounce (outdoor fresh, original) sheets put in your belt loops repels mosquitoes. The fragrance is oleander, and mosquitoes don't like it. (We used to use the Bounce sheets to repel no-see-ems in SC)
• Two tablets of Efferdent, dropped in water, are perfect for cleaning a diamond ring, or a toilet, or for cleaning a burned pan (you may want to use 3 or 4 tablets).
• Use white vinegar in a 50/50 solution with water for washing windows. Vinegar is also a  deodorant. Put some vinegar in a glass and leave it on the counter to get rid of cooking odors.
• If you put 1 tsp. of Dawn dishwashing liquid in a spray bottle filled with water, it will kill ants. 
• Put 3/4 can of beer out to attract bees, wasps or hornets. Hang the can from trees by threading a string through the pop top. 
• Crisco is great for removing paint, moisturizing your face, or as a diaper rash ointment.
• Miracle whip, Cool Whip or Pepto Bismal are perfect for facials.  Wash up with warm water, apply the product, then rinse with cool water.

No, Joey is not demonstrating the "Scales of Justice" in this photo! He is holding a bowl that is aflame, and a box of Baking Soda to douse the fire. But, the interesting thing is that Joey demonstrated the perfect fire starter for camping on a rainy day... or on any day, for that matter.

Joey poured Doritos into the bowl and lit them with one of those handy-dandy butane fire starters. The chips readily caught on fire, and burned long enough that they would encourage even the dampest wood to catch fire. And, just as quickly as he started the fire, he doused it with the baking soda, reminding us that we all have it in our kitchen and should reach for it in the event of a kitchen fire, before reaching for a messy extinguisher.

Then, Joey proceeded to make me cry. OK, so, it doesn't take a lot to make me cry. Give me a Reader's Digest magazine and my eyes are bound to leak over more than one story. But, you need to know that Joey didn't upset me, he made me cry because I was laughing so hard! I'm just glad I didn't wet my pants.... although I'm sure he would have had a solution for that!

Joey talked about 'feminine products'. He explained that the very last thing men want to touch is 'feminine products'. Therefore, the perfect place to hide extra cash would be rolled up and stuck in the tubes of tampons. In this photo, Joey demonstrates that 'feminine napkins' make wonderful knee pads... they even come with handy adhesive strips to stick on your pants! Furthermore, they make fantastic pads for washing windows. Often, when living on an RV, moisture in the motorhome condenses on the windshield. Joey suggested that the next time that happens, grab a 'napkin', stick it on your hand, and wipe the moisture off. The image I had in my mind of Mr. Dreamy waving a sanitary napkin around just about did me in!

Joey has published a number of books. If you are interested in new ways to use everyday products you may want to check out his most recent book, "Joey Green's Cleaning Magic". I guarantee you will find more than one new trick!

OK... now, for the headgear that Joey is sporting in the first picture. Did you guess what it is? It is a disposable diaper that has been soaked with water. Joey explained that soaking a diaper, and then putting it on your head or draping it on your neck is an excellent way to cool off when it is unbearably hot outside. He mentioned a number of other useful ways to use a disposable diaper, besides swaddling a baby's bum... but, I won't tell all of his secrets.... you'll have to get his book to find out many uses for diapers and other everyday household products.

Do you have a use for something that is different from its original intended use?

Joey Green's Web Site, listing more books he has written: Wackyuses.com