Sunday, November 24, 2013

Do Not Fold, Spindle or Mutilate

I spent hours making a beautiful card for Thanksgiving, quilling leaves in warm fall colors and quilling a cornucopia spilling with pumpkins, squash, carrots, apples, grapes and corn... all made of strips of paper. I whirled and twirled the paper, and used sticky glue that made the papers stick to my fingers, and then placed all of the itty-bitty pieces on the card. Did I think to take a picture? No... darn it! But the leaves I made looked very similar to these.... and I clustered them together along the top and one side of the card. The cornucopia was in the opposite corner, with its contents spilling along the bottom of the card.


I ventured to the post office to mail the card to my brother and his wife. Since I had stupidly made the card too large for a normal envelope, I used a padded envelope I had on hand. When I arrived at the counter, I asked the PO employee if she had a "Do Not Bend" stamp (realizing I hadn't written it on the envelope in red ink). She picked up the envelope, and bent it... both ways... (yeah, lady, it does bend!) before saying that she didn't have a stamp and even if she did, it wouldn't guarantee that the envelope wouldn't be bent. Inside a voice was shouting..."don't bend it - you idiot!" On the outside I kept my cool.
The postal employee did her magic with the scale and the computer and declared, "That will be $2.10." The read-out I could see declared my piece to be a "parcel".... not a letter. I asked her when a letter became a parcel. Whereupon she picked my envelope up, bent it one way, then the other... and said, "it all depends on the size."
At this point, it is a good thing that I don't have any hormones left in my body, or I would have been screaming at the lady, "WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT DO NOT BEND?!!!" I might have been reduced to a sobbing blob on the post office floor, or other patrons may have had to restrain me as I clawed my way over the counter to throttle the postal employee.  Instead, I shut my mouth, fumed inside, and marched out of the Post Office.
I mean, really, is it so hard to understand "Do NOT bend"?!


3 comments:

  1. I think I might have politely asked her to please DO NOT BEND! I have noticed more people with NO common sense. None.
    Happy Thanksgiving and I hope your card arrived safe.

    Cindy Bee

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  2. I bet it was a beautiful card and I hope it arrives safely. Idiots at the Post Office..no wonder the US Postal Service has no money. No hormones left..is that what keeps us (me) calmer than years ago..I guess so! :)

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  3. No wonder there is something called POSTAL RAGE!!! I'm sorry and I hope it gets there in perfect condition!!

    Linda
    http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com


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